What's up yo. You are a product of all of your life experiences. And I have a few that would make you scratch your head.
Instead of ending it all, my fighter instinct pushed me to keep going. I'm learning to accept that not everyone can succeed doing the cool stuff, as a friend once said.
My experiences would tell you that I should be in a much better predicament than I'm in now. But the universe has other plans I see. I'm certainly a rose growing from concrete.